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This one comes with some warnings for angst, suicidal thoughts, and a little bit of swearing. Since these can be triggery for some people, I am putting this behind a cut


Charles came back to the world slowly. At first he thought he was in a hospital again. He smelled that odd hospital smell of antiseptics and lemon floor cleaner. His head felt like someone had taken a baseball bat to it.

“Charles?” he heard Hank say over the ringing in his ears.

He tried to say “yes’ but could only come out with a rough croak of it.

He felt someone lift up his head and put a straw against his lips. He drank deeply through the straw. Water had never tasted sweeter to him.

“Charles, you are still in the mansion. We couldn’t move you safely even with Azazel showing up from where ever he goes off to.”

Charles cleared his throat “How long?”

“Since you first passed out? A week?”

“What happened?” he started to feel like his tongue was cooperating with his mouth.

Erik’s voice cut through the air “We were hoping that you could tell us.”

Charles turned his head towards the voice “I don’t remember anything at all.”

Then he saw images in his head.

He was screaming and pitched out of the chair he was sitting in. Erik picked him up and shook him trying to get him to some out of it. The others came running into the room to see Erik holding Charles who was weeping and sobbing on Erik’s chest.

He saw himself being put on a cot in Hank’s makeshift infirmary. They had to strap him down for fear that he would hurt himself. He was shouting and screaming at them to let him go. He pleaded and begging for release from the pain. Just let him kill himself it would be easier than this half-life that he was now cursed with. They would be better off without the burden of him. Hank sedated him but it didn’t seem to do much good.

He howled about the tree of the world and how it was rotten at the core. He spoke in many different languages bits and pieces of conversations. Anyone around him had to be slightly sedated because Charles was projecting his pain and fear and pleas to just let him go.

And then he heard Erik say “Get Out of My Head Charles! Now!”

All went back to silence and blackness.

“Charles?” asked Hank.

“What the hell is happening to me?” asked Charles.

“As near as I can tell since I don’t have access to much that I can’t build myself, your brain is trying to repair itself but, if this keeps up, you are going to die before your brain can heal” said Hank.

“Your own mind is trying to kill you Charles” said Erik “and it very nearly succeeded this time.”

Charles tried to sit up and found that he was still strapped to the bed. “A little help please?” He heard the pregnant pause in the room “I’m here and I am sane. I am not going to try to kill myself or any of you.”

He heard foot steps come into the room. It was a lighter tread. Then he heard Raven’s voice “Oh for Pete sake. Let him up.”

“We have been tricked before.”

“I know my idiot brother. He is here both body and soul.” He felt her remove the restrains and helped him sit up.

Charles tried to use his ability again but only got static which was more than he had before. He was no longer alone in his head but he couldn’t make heads or tails of the things he was sensing.

“Charles, “rumbled Erik “Knock it off or we will sedate you again.”

Charles stopped pushing with his mind.

He felt Hank’s presences close to him. He turned his head towards where he thought Hank was.

“Charles, can you see me?” asked Hank rather tentatively.

“No, still can’t see a bloody thing but it’s strange. It is almost like I can sense you or where you are.”

“Well that’s at least a step in the right direction” said Raven.

Erik grunted. Charles could tell that he was not sanguine with all this, “And if he decided to have us help him kill himself? What do we do then?”

Raven helped Charles to his unsteady feet “We stop him.”

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